MuSiC oF mY LiFe

~~Thursday, February 28, 2008~~

I am touched by someone today.

Dreaded to go to practice and it was for small grp pract. From noon till night. Nv tot it would be productive. Decided to head for dinner with some others, when a phonecall came to my pres. As nonchalant as i was, i heard a name and my heart skipped a beat - Alex. I was shocked.

He was coming.

I couldn't believe my ears and i have mixed tots. My pres was told Alex is here to listen to our pract, listen how my previous instructor conduct, and if he can, he will help us. We are such pathetic fools.

I was told he would arrive at night. And we hastily changed our small grp pract to MAIN grp pract and i made my very best to give the due respect Alex shld have. I demanded drinks and proper attendance suddenly. Ha. Such impact and change when its someone worthy of ur effort.

I tot he would arrive at 8+ with that instructor of mine. But no! I receive a phonecall at 7pm sharp. He has arrived. 7pm sharp, cos he heard our pract starts that time. How cool is that. He is that punctual. I stepped into the room slowly..packing up the mess while he talks to my pres. I saw him from afar, i just cant believe my eyes. Suddenly, he called out to me. I was shocked he remembered me. My name and all. Asking of life and all. Its was a wonderful feeling to see an old fren again...

I apologised to him. For many reasons that flooded my head. I said sorry, cos' he had to find his way to our music room when our darn instructor just throw him an address and made him find his way to our room, himself. I said sorry, cos' he had to climb the darn high hill and stairs cos the place is so inaccessible. I said sorry, cos' its unfair for him, to ask him to conduct another conductor's piece of music only when tt conductor cant make it. I said sorry, cos' as if making use of him is not enough, he was only given 2 wks from the concert to make this whole thing work. I said sorry, cos'...he agreed to help, without hesitation, after he realise, we wanna make this concert come true...and he didn't wanna let it fall..he didn't wanna let us fall...

I salute him, for his willingness tp help, for his integrity, for his love for music, for his character, for his generosity, for his passion to teach students, for his heart for all..

He came for the 1st time, to listen to us play. However, his passion to teach and make us better, gave him the strength to decide to conduct us for the 1st time today. The feeling was undescribable. I nv once whine at his lame jokes, nor his off-timing at times, or his advises. I listened attentively, digesting every word and treasuring his every teaching. In fact, i really appreciate him here. My frens noticed the difference.

End of pract, he came over to talk abit more. Telling about how his health has been. His shrunken built and weaker body just makes its more hurting to see him here cos' it meant so much more now. I would like to invite him to watch the concert, not watch him help. All i can say is, thanks Mr. Alex. Having u here is really a nice surprise. Attending ur ensemble practice gave me a nice feeling at pract again. I miss the old times, both good times and the bad.

Thank you Mr. Alex Abisheganaden.

There are even more changes and hiccups in the preparation for the concert. I duno why. Perhaps its not meant to easy from the start...But...i believe i will try my best to pull through. 2 wks to concert.

1:12 AM

~~Saturday, February 23, 2008~~

WARNING: THIS IS A LONG POST. SLEEPYHEADS R PRONE TO BE KNOCKED OUT IN 10 SECs.

I can only say I've been pigging out ever since the start of CNY this year. Mountains of food day after days of visting and dinner. Its a vicious cycle when the whole "I treat u, U treat me" thing starts going around. So, its reunion dinner hopping from auntie's house to grandma's to parents frens house this year. Its been a long long time since we practice this manz. On my own side, i did invite fren's over for some chillin' session, mahjonging etc. Went to laoshi's hse, frens house too! haha..Busy busy, but red packet income like eh...no diff...so low. Need more mahjonging! who wants?

Then the preceding wks was like an worker bee doing assignments + having quizzes here and there, then..came valentine's, which i totally tried ignoring cos some dumbo say he's nt free. And the day be4 was alr supposed to go his relative's hse 4 dinner. Thus, I just tooK the dinner like a meeting day alr..since he is like..wayyyyyy busy. Who noes, i was set in a trap all along. Went to meet ahem @ harbourfront be4 to take mrt to his relative's, then he was late (as usual), BUT for like 1hr+! Said got extra duty..damn pissed, wanted to leave liao. Then he came, say mrt spoil(which was really spoilt). Den was so hungry went to have dinner 1st, then go his relatives hse. Stayed for quite awhile blah blah blah, then finally when i wanna return
hostel he accompanied, and kept asking if he sent halfway can anot, which became annoying after awhile. Lol. We reached n he said he wan toilet n i went up alone to hostel to NOT expect gifts on my table. Tot it was a prank my roomie did on me. Till i saw his handwriting, then i start to get my orientation rite. Was both darn shocked n amused. haha..

I walked outta room wanted to hatam him alr when i saw him TRYing to hide behind a pillar (which wasn't extremely thick), and i burst out laughing. It wasn't all cos he actually hid all the pressies n i was supposed to find. And i did, while he enjoyed e scene with occasional smirking remarks. Too bad, i was too talented cos my room wasnt exceptionally big. Lol. To begin with, he actually contact my roomie a few days ago n planned this stuff, the duty and all were lies lar. Roar. But duno y e mrt was on his side. Then so, he planned e route n all tt day n it was a success it worked out for him tt he was grinning from ear to ear lar..FYI, my stupid roomie actualy left e room so she wun be there to spoil e mood. Dumb gal. Erm, But
recall tt i din get him anything, so i promised sth special. Lol. He was darn lucky on e way home when he left sooo late, and still managed to even get on BUSES (still can change normal buses) like ard 1+ 2am la. Haha..

Went another fren's hse on sat, steamboat session + mahjonging + slacking + outdoor movie screening! haha..pics later too..haha..so cool. If only when i start working my frenz could all still chill like tt. think long long maybe can. lol.

Ooh..sun went back batam, indonesia, to pray grandmama and to bai nian. Wootx. Nv managed to take full photo with them cos everyone was soo busy entertaining each other..but my couz all v cute and pretty and handsome!!! haha..wah raoz..all take after my mother side genes. kaoz. how come my genes so..eh..diluted. lOl. But v funny, when we praying for the food thing to them + some incense paper, chinese religious way to "ask" the spirits qns were to use 2 3D-moon-shaped wood to indicate when they ask and throw e wood la. Then 2 "open" wood means "laughing", "1 open 1 close" means "yes/ok", then 2 "close" is "no". Interesting rite. Then my relatives vvvv kan jiong cos they wana go shopping. So they keep "asking" if "they" are done with the food and all, then the cute thing is....no matter WHO ask and throw, the ans is the same- "laughing"!!! It happen to EVERYONE. Then i kept saying sth like..aiya they happy lar..just let them "eat" slowly lar..Then my relative kept laughing..and they continue throwing the wood EVERY 2-3min (told u they kan jiong liao) till 1.5hr later then once someone throw and got the FIRST "ok", they chiong to clear the stuff. Diaoz..haha..

Ate lunch..yummy man! The fish maw pig tummy soup..sedap! Then..got things like the crackers...ban kien kueh (wah raoz..so THICK, juicy and fragrant with condense milk + ALOT of peanut) wah raoz..(drooling), if nv eat this in indo, u nv considered coming man! then..the avogado drink! (this one also!!!) Ooo..and the potato donut! (arhhh) Wah..sinful sia!!! 1 day nt enough lar!!! haha..I nv buy clothes cos no time..But i did buy sth!!! 2 percussioninstruments!!! A rainmaker (those when u flip will produce "raining" sound) + a drum! YEah! Oh..and some craft accesory. Hek...yeah...

wEnt back at nite..and have to RUSH back to hostel..sian rite? hhaa..cos got quiz and assg and MIDTERM EXAM tt week..play play play, nv do work. siaoz de. haha...so chiong all of them..But my guitar pract took up DAYS of my wk..everytime pract from 7pm to 11+ 12+am de..so reached back hostel bathe like 1am then start doing some work..4am+ 5am+ den slp..
Oh, Helped set up a booth too! Hahah..

And i did promise ahem a surprise..so...after 4am+ do sth a lil' bit everyday (except wed, cos thur exam!) to do some stuff...and tada..the wk was over..and so my surprise was ready too~ hek. So we Met after my meeting in sch. Enjoyed dinner and some activities...Lol..then finally yeah...the surprise @ wee hours of e nite..LOl...yeah. Nice nice~~

Ok..this wk was like a superwoman. Next wk recess wk. Which means exams after tt. Lols..But still got TONs of guitar pract (pls come for concert, LAST performance!) and loads of asssg. Haiz. hah..In any case..jiayou..i need more power....! Later gonna watch ah long movie..outdoor screening again..yeah! ^ ^

"Thanks aaaalot...who noes a blockhead will a crack abt such stuffs sia...u've got moves i haven seen~ Happy 8th..."

4:00 PM

~~Monday, February 04, 2008~~

i m now listening to some disney magic hits and the song-shooting stars is playing now...Sounds inspiring at this moment now. Seeing a shooting star to some is like having a dream come true. It just somehow signifies some wish that come true. Have been dealing alot of my oncoming concert.

Someone asked me recently, "how's the preparation so far?"

"Trying...trying. ups and downs. I just got the feeling that we(my committee) are in the eye of the storm. Was so stormy a while ago. Now seems quiet and calm, but i sense we will have sth to think abt again.", i replied.

True enough. Just when the practise momentum seem to pick up a lil..when i get things going...pple working..my instructor drop us a big bomb. Pple who talks to be abt it and know wad i was always rumbling abt noes that i m nt v fond of our instructor. (and he always pick on me) BUt in any case, he came one day after the previous day practise looking as snob as usual. the previous nite, we reminded him tt he is conducting for my ensemble on the performance day..and he playing a solo item. then the next day, he just like purposely pulled out his hp and showed my president with an expression that says "oh, can u see? I will be flying off to germany on ur performance day. what a pity...u good luck then". ?!!? and he went on to teach other pple. Wad the freak..

After tt my VP and P came to tell me, that was like 7pm n pract just started not long. I was so fuming mad.and i got so pissed cos everything of mine was set to go as smoothly as possible tt's y we asked him the final time the previous day and now when everything is sent for printing etc...then now he just like heck this whole thing. after tt for the next 1hr+, i spent my time thinking of hw to salvage the situation..really was so helpless. my alto grp section all saw me sitting on the floor instead of the chair practicing and they came over, sat with me and i just like grumbled to them..Then the more i tot of him the instructor, the more i fumed. JUst then, he walked over to want to "train" the altos section. and he was shock to see us all sitting on the ground NOT practising. So he just like asked in a v snob way, "where are all the altos? Want to practise anot?" I was so fuming mad i just glared at him.1s..2s...3s...all the way. He asked abt 3times..I just cant turned my head away, and i just glared intensely at him...more fiercely each time..not on purposely but i just couldn't imagine how could an instructor be soooo irresponsible. U all still dun feel the same way cos i haven reveal the 2nd half of the story. after tt, he just got abit guilty or wad lar..then he just like said sth like "oh, it seems like u all are in a meeting..u all can cont to discuss ok?" then he walked away to another section. My gaze was still sticked on his dumbass face.

Ok, y i was so angry cos i got to noe his dirty lil shameful secret. That same day, i heard from seniors that he always "runs" away whenever he feel tt the ensemble is nt good enough. He would not wan to "ruin" his reputation or wadever he thinks he has. He would just make up an excuse or two just to not appear. as an instructor..or shld i make it more respectful 1st, TEACHER. how could u EVER EVER despise YOUR students like tt? 不是有教无类吗? I tot u shld have some teacher's morals to teach whoever who is willing to learn? And wad i m saying ain't without prove. THe previous alternate batches, he actually "flew their aeroplane" either a few wks BEFORE the concert and 1 of them worst, the DAY of concert itself...he suddenly rang the president and say he cant make it..flying off AGAIN. I dun believe in such shit lor. EVEN IF U REALLY HAVE TO FLY, U, AS OUR instructor...this place...as YOUR club...u shld stay..no matter wad. Also, he CHOOSE performance to WATCH. what is this all abt? If the club was ever mine, i would have just change an instructor and make a complaint, regardless whether or not it is of use. I need to voice out. This is ridiculous.

Other matters like grants and sponsorship and issues like songs etc are also issues tt trouble me...BUt these things seem minute when this instructor is in the picture. He certainly can make me flar up. my guitar mates saw an ugly side of me tt nite.

Anyway, enough of tt...things will go our way with more hard work n passion. had a meeting too..not too bad..got some stuff and issues out..and delegated work for pple...it was a fri alr...great..weekend...home...=> went hm to drop my stuff before gg out. Mum wasn't please i m gg out at first buT ke lian me..so allowed me to go. lol.

went to chinatown walk walk..then dinner...then it was alr...12+ 1am!! and i became so blur. Bought tix to watch sweeney todd at 1.4oam. But we were abit late in the end..and blur me..rushed into a theatre of the same show, NOT knowing tt it was the earlier slot theatre. SO we watched like 40min den it ended!!! We was like shocked lar!! and it was only when we were on the way home then it struck me tt i brought us to the wrong theatre! Arhhh..and the movie tix was like 10 bucks each. wah rao...faintx...BLUR...

sat went to my uncle's hse for dinner..some relative hse. Wasnt close to them..and no one near my age generation..so end up got entertained by their 2 dogs..lOl..i was pretty shag alr..But after tt travelled to my other auntie's hse cos my sis wan to play with my niece..and i end up dozing there. lOl...after tt..went to hougang with them for some pasar malam..end up closed...and my dad got HUNGry AGAIN..so we went to some coffeeshop..reached hm like at 1+ 2am lar..watched american idol recorded down by my sis till 3+. haha..

today..did nth much. But had to do housework..did some packing..etc..then dinner.dropped off stuff here and there then back hostel. there's a quiz tml. No confidence no hope. scored 0% past quiz. sianz. actually..got alot of unsettled stuff to do on my mind..just not doing it yet. lol...CNY mood? I duno..haha..

Hope this year will be a great year. Don't let me down.

"a spoonful of sugar makes the medicine go down..."

"bribe me like how u bribe some OTHERs...lol"

1:15 AM